Supporting a Bereaved Child

• The age of your child will have an effect on how they respond to the death and their level of understanding.

• It is important that you explain as honestly as you can what has happened but you will need to tailor this to your child’s level of understanding. The aim is not to scare children but to give them information. Children have very active imaginations and see and hear more than we give them credit for. They need you to explain what has really happened and to put it into context in their world.

• Don’t forget children grieve too. Ask them what they need and want and how they feel. They may want to come to the funeral; they may have their own special way of saying goodbye or remembering.

• Don’t expect children to react the way you would. Children don’t have the same emotional spectrum or coping skills that adults do and they may exhibit some very extreme behaviour – if you are concerned discuss it with your GP but expect ongoing changes which you will have to support them through.

• If you are struggling to cope then get help, from both friends and family and from a wider support network of healthcare professionals.

• Explain to those around you that your child has experienced a death; this may include close friends.

• It is important to inform playgroups or school to ensure that allowances are made and that any emotional distress or unusual behaviour can be picked up and support offered.

You can find extra help and support here:

BBC - Helping Bereaved Children

Childhood Bereavement Network

Winston’s Wish

Cruse Bereavement's Youth Project

Child Bereavement Trust

The Compassionate Friends